shame

I dreamt, that I'm in the village of my grandparents. We ride on a cart. I read. I perceive, that the people are looking strange. I think about. I put my penis in my trousers. I understand: it's improper here. I read further, but I felt: they are looking still strange. I'm a stranger at home.
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I often think about returning to Transylvania. (Romania) I thought, I'm already on the right way to cope with traditional values and my feelings...